Cannon Fodder

 Over the past decade or so we've seen a huge boom in video games based on wars with the likes of the record breaking Call of Duty series, Battlefield and Medal of Honour all selling by the bucket load. These games are released almost every year and often met with huge critical acclaim despite often portraying war as something glamorous and sexy. This wasn't always the case and in 1993 when Sensible Software released point and click action adventure game “Cannon Fodder” they were met by a huge wave of disgust from the likes of the Royal British Legion and a number of MP's.

 

Unlike modern war games like Call of Duty, Sensible didn't feel the need to glorify war to make Cannon Fodder fun. Instead of making war attractive Sensible looked at the loss of life due to war, something the game reflects amazingly well with each soldier on your team being given a name when they are fighting and later a tombstone when they are dead (as well as their name put on a list of casualties at the end of the level).

Almost 20 years after the release of Cannon Fodder, few games have given war such a raw feeling, a feeling of wars being about a loss not about killing people but about people dying. A subtle difference but a difference all the same. Though of course there is much more to Cannon Fodder than merely the aspect of death.

  

Unlike many modern war based games Cannon Fodder doesn't rely on you needing to pick head shots but instead look after your troops as you complete numerous missions, such as saving hostages or killing the enemy. This is done via the player needing to use various forms of strategy, such as leaving a soldier on the beach to provide cover for another soldier swimming across a small river or leaving a soldier shooting a barracks whilst another soldier gets a box of grenades. Whilst the strategies are generally quite simple the game it's self is incredibly deep, both on a gameplay level and as a look at war.

Of course with the game being almost 20 years old it's not fared well on the graphics front, especially not compared to modern day war games, which have been described by some as “so realistic they could be from a real warzone”. Yet the graphics do their job of showing the different terrain, the enemy and the player as well as the various items and vehicles that the player needs to see. Likewise the in-game music isn't as impressive as modern games but it does it's job...and in fact the theme tune is one of video games all time great tacks.

Whilst the game does look aged and was controversial at the time at it's heart it's a fun strategy game with a sprinkling of dark humour and a look at war that is much more sombre than other war based video games. It's a truly tremendous game that simply needs to be played by every gamer.

 

89%

Details:
Console-Sega Mega Drive, SNES, Amiga, Gameboy (and others)
Release-1993
Developer-Sensible Software
Genre-Strategy
Players-1

Quote take from: http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3883630/Video-game-Battlefield-looks-frighteningly-like-the-real-thing.html

Trivia-
The games theme song was professionally recorded and can be listened to below thanks to gazchap

Kid Chameleon

 Now a days every other game seems to be a bland looking first person shooter (FPS) but back in the 1990's games were more often than not platformers. Of course the kings of platform were Mario (on the Nintendo systems) and Sonic (on the Sega systems) though this didn't stop other platformers from being incredibly good games such as this one, Kid Chameleon.



The back story of the game is pretty meaningless but you're effectively playing a game inside a game. The local arcade has a new virtual reality game, called "Wildside" which has been abducting it's players and you, as Kid Chameleon must defeat the game and save the kids who have been taken by the game. Despite having such a pointless story the game it's self is actually excellent.

Although platformers were the big thing of the 1990's Kid Chameleon differentiated it's self from most of the other platform games of the era in a number of ways. Firstly, unlike most platform games you're not stuck in a single form, in fact Kid Chameleon sees the player taking 10 different forms, each with their own power. These range from the Kid (a child in jeans) to an Iron Knight (who can climb vertical walls) to Hovercraft rider (who can ride on the roof of levels). It's these helmets that give the game not only extra depth but also different strategies. For example you may wish to keep the "Cyclone" helmet which can fly to get through some levels or you may which to keep the Maniaxe mask which allows you to throw axes at enemies from a distance.

As well as the number of different forms (and strategies) a player can use to get through the game the game also stands out from the rest of the platformers on it's sheer size. The game in total features over 100 levels, and whilst you won't have to visit them all you will have to visit a lot of them (unless you use a cheat). Whilst this makes the game very long it's also rather frustrating as the game features neither a password system nor a save feature (at least in it's original form). This generally means most players will never manage to complete the game despite a number of shortcuts in the game.

Despite being one of the toughest games ever to actually complete it's also a game that has so much wealth to it that it's actually impossible to hate. The various helmets add so much to the game that always feels so fresh and original even when you've played through it before.

Whilst some of the graphics and some of the sound does fall below the standard of the gameplay it's merely a minor complaint (much like the games length) and you will find yourself really enjoying an excellent and unusual game.

87%

Details:
Console-Sega Mega Drive
Release-1992
Developer-Sega Technical Institute
Genre-2D Platformer
Players-1or 2

Trivia- To player can complete the game by completing as little as 3 levels by skipping from the 2nd level to the final level.

SPOILERS/MEGA CHEAT
At the end of Blue Lake Woods 2 you need to jump on the last prize block above the flag, then press Right/Down + Jump. You will skip one to the final level "Plethora".

Sonic The Hedgehog 2

Although Sonic the Hedgehog had been introduced to the gaming world in the first Sonic game in 1991 it was the sequel that really helped Sonic take over the world. Released in 1992 for the Sega Genesis (or Mega Drive) the game added a number of new features and improved on every part of the original game. To some it is not only the seminal Sonic game, but the seminal 2D platformer.

The first thing a player notices when they turn the game on is now recogniseable face of Miles "Tails" Prower on the title screen alongside Sonic. Soon afterwards the upgraded music kicks in and the player starts to realise they are now playing a special game

 the music adds more than one would imagine and it adds something throughout the whole game.

When you start the first level you feel completely at home as the level has a lot of similarities to the opening
level in the first Sonic game, though it's not long before the improved level design and graphics start to wow you. Levels now bring in not only multiple routes but scenery  that really plays a part such as lefts, pipes and slides that all come together to create a much fuller experience than the first game. Though the basis of the game is the same, the player controls Sonic (or Tails) and have to defeat Dr Robotnik (Dr Eggman in some versions) to save the world. The improvements are really brilliant and add a lot, not just in presentation but also in playability adding the now trademark spindash to the series.

With 20 in game levels (spread over 11 zones) and 7 bonus stages the game will take some time to get through though what you will find is that the game is genuinely a joy to play. The creative team from Team Sonic really nailed the 2D platform genre and made it not only a playable joy but a memorable experience. Even the worst levels in the games are wonderfully complex with out getting frustrating or annoying (see the water levels in the original Sonic game).

Whilst I personally feel Sonic 3 (and Knuckles) is the the best Sonic "game", Sonic 2 is a very complete and thrilling experience that really must be played by every single serious gamer.

92%

Details:
Console-Mega Drive
Release-1992
Developer-Team Sonic
Genre-2D Platformer
Players-1or 2

Trivia-
Sonic 2 added multiplayer to the Sonic platform genre with a 2 player racing game and allowed a second player to control Tails.

Barbie Super Model

Sometimes when reviewing these old games I have to ask myself 2 questions, 1-"Why?" and 2-"What am I doing with my life?" They have never been asked as much as when I was playing Barbie Super Model a game that has you continually wondering why you even bother with these sorts of games.

The first thing you notice is the pink overload, the game almost seems like someone has used pink paint brush and tried to use it as much as they can to create the games "look". Though rather funnily the pink is the least the games problems, in fact it's just one of many.
 The player controls Barbie who starts the game in a convertible (see above) and needs to get from the start of the level to the end of it to practice her catwalk routine. Then the player needs to guide Barbie back to the start of the level. You can make barbie go up, down slow down or speed up to avoid crashing into other cars though in the end of it it's simple, dull and boring.



Along the way you can run into a gift box or a camera and play one of the games two mini games. These games involve matching Barbie's clothes to that of a magazine cover, effectively a glorified memory game that involves the player looking at Barbie in a swimsuit (yeah it's as sexy as looking at a dead turkey).

After you get back to the start of the level you do a catwalk section needing to repeat the routine you practiced in the middle of the level. After completing this you need to do the entire thing again...this time on roller skates at the beach. It's much the same as the opening car section of the game except the obstacles have changed to include people and beach balls. Again you need to get to the end of the level to do a practice routine then make your way to the start of the 

level to put your practice into action. This same level pattern is repeated between the games final 2 levels (in which Barbie walks through a ski resort and cycles through a park).

 Whilst the game's "levels" are rather pathetic and monotonously slow they also feature frustrating items like snowballs being thrown at the player for what appears to be no reason. If the player is struck they lose a life (which is indicated in the top left of the screen) and losing all the life will see them given a Game over screen.

Sadly as well as having the fun of Christmas in Cromwell's era and enough pink and purple to make your eyes bleed the music and sound effects sound as if they were designed to give you headaches. Whilst we don't expect CD quality sounds in a SNES or Mega Drive game we don't expect to have our ears assaulted by bleeps, blips and blops that sound like our speakers are damaged.

The game has very little in case of redeeming factors and really is a nightmare of a game that is best off ignored unless your a 5 year old girl who thinks that Barbie is the perfect role model.

14%

Details:
Console-SNES/Mega Drive
Release-1992
Developer-Tahoe Software Productions
Genre-Action
Players-1 or 2

Trivia:
Their is a ROM of the unreleased Game Gear version going around

Aladdin (Mega Drive)

In recent years games based on movies have generally been turgid affairs where it's been an obvious cash in, however that's not always been the case. In the early 1990's a number of licenses were taken into the video gaming world and turned into exceptional games and one of the very best was "Aladdin". Whilst this is a review for the Mega Drive version there were other versions available each of which was different to each other (the SNES and Mega Drive games are hugely different but both are excellent).

 In the game the player controls Aladdin who is armed with apples and a sword. You need to use those weapons to defeat enemies as you go through some of the most amazingly crafted levels of any 2D. The levels combine themes of the movie with wonderful gameplay whilst featuring all memorable locations as you attempt to dethrone the evil Jafar.

Where the game really stands out are the amazing graphics that use cel shading to provide a glorious background. The game also uses some of the most fluid animation for the characters and was worked on by Disney animators. This leads to the game having one of the most visually impressive displays on the Mega Drive. This is aided by some wonderful music that again seems amazing for the time and really did stand out on the Mega Drive.

As well as being a smooth game that plays wonderfully, has amazing graphics and amazing sound the game also has moments of brilliant humour and fan service. If you look at the image above you can see an enemy with his pants on show whilst the image on the left show some "Mickey Mouse ears" on the washing line.Whilst these are just extra little bonuses they do bring a little more to the game and help show off the Disney charm.

Although the main gain isn't that long (2-3 hours) you will find yourself coming back and trying to find some of the little secrets that are in the game and this again falls back on the games charm. Although I won't say it's the best platformer on the console it's certainly one of the most fun and one of the very best presented games of the era. It's also one of the greatest games based on the movie so well done the folks at Virgin for not just cashing in.

90%

Details:
Console-Sega Mega Drive (other versions are available, but differ from the Mega Drive version)
Release-1993
Developer-Virgin Interactive
Genre-2D Platformer
Players-1

Trivia:
A number of the developers of the game would later form Shiny Entertainment who created the equally wonder Earthworm Jim games.
Virgin Interactive would also be responsible for "The Lion King" and "The Jungle Book", both highly acclaimed Mega Drive titles based on animated movies.

Sonic The Hedgehog

In 1991 the video game world would welcome one of the biggest names in video game history with the launch of "Sonic The Hedgehog". The game, released on the Sega Mega Drive/Genesis became one of the keys behind Sega's huge boom in the early 1990's and the success of the Mega Drive/Genesis.

Although Nintendo had well established Mario character Sega's mascot up to then was somewhat lacking, but with Sonic at the helm they had a bad-ass hedgehog to challenge the Plumber.

The game is a 2D platform game with emphasis mainly on speed with Sonic being able to run at blistering speeds as he charges through the games levels. In total the game has 19 proper levels (with 6 "Zones" broken into 3 "acts" as well as a Final Zone) and a number of "Special Zones" where Sonic attempts to get a chaos emerald. Through out the Zones sonic will come across a variety of obstacles, enemies and a boss created by "Dr Robotnik" (or Dr Eggman).

In the game Sonic gets to collect a number of power ups including a shield and temporary invincibility though the main collectable are the golden rings that litter the levels. If the player collects 100 rings in a level they will be given a new life though the rings have a second purpose, if the player gets hit with out any rings they will die (if they have rings they will be thrown about the screen allowing for Sonic to re-collect them).

As well as the fast paced gameplay the game also features some fabulous music which often has an uptempo feel to it and sound as good as the game plays.

Whilst it's hugely fun and rather expansive the game does have it's serious flaws, mainly the frustrating level design of some of the later levels, most notably the water levels. For example Scrap Brain Act 3 feels badly designed and it seems to have enemies appearing at the worst times as well as having air bubbles spaced too far apart.

The level select screen

Whilst the game is wonderfully well crafted on the whole it has too many flaws to be called the "King of Platforming" as some declare it to be. The game is relatively short (if you take out the frustration of Scrap Brain Act 3) and on the whole it's "simple". Whilst it's not the greatest 2D platform game, it is a game that set the platform for the follow up Sonic games (including the amazing Sonic The Hedgehog 2).

88%

Details:
Console-Mega Drive
Release-1991
Developer-Team Sonic
Genre-2D Platformer
Players-1

Trivia:
The game became the "Pack in title" for the Mega Drive/Genesis much like Tetris had been for the Game Boy
The "Banner and stars" title screen was also used by Sega in the "Alex Kidd" and "Wonder Boy" games.

Fatman

 When it comes to terrible terrible games few compete with "Fatman" (also known as "Slaughter Sport") on the Sega Mega Drive/Genesis. It's a game that almost makes "Pit Fighter" look like an enjoyable nights entertainment.

The game is a 2D fighting game (think Street Fight II or the early Mortal Kombat games) but one that really has very, very little going for it other than it's cult status as a broken and frustrating game. In fact it's awfulness is probably the only reason anyone even remembers the game.

 It's easy to make a bad game, but it's hard to make such a bad game that has no real redeeming factors. Firstly you are greeted by a big breasted man (see the screen shot) and a cross over of a mermaid and a mutated leopard. This should have said it all really, but then you get music that sounds like a computer being abused by a nerd who wants to test whether or not their Mac can feel pain. These would usually be signs that I should be turning a game off but yet worse was yet to come.


The in game graphics, whilst not terrible really don't do anything good for the game but what's worse are the controls and the lag which really make it unplayable. The game plays as if it's drunk and doesn't know what you're telling it to do, it acts as if taking a command is against it's code and it'll just do whatever it likes (which is generally nothing). Whilst your character is impossible to control the computer controlled character seems to never miss.

It's ugly, it gives you an earache and it feels like your fingers are worthless. When a game simply doesn't want to work there is little you can do but stick it in "The Hall of Shame" and hope others manage to avoid it.

11%

Details:
Console-Mega Drive
Release-1991
Developer-Atari
Genre-Fighting
Players-1or 2

Trivia-
It was previously released as Mondu's Fight Palace and Tongue of the Fatman

It's awful and it will make you want to kill yourself.

Barney's Hide & Seek Game

Warning: This game is awful, please do not hunt it down, it's not worth the time or effort.

Now I had to start the review with that as some fool (you know who you are) WILL go and download this game and will go "you are talking garbage mate, it can't be that bad", trust me, it is...thankfully however it will complete it's self if you leave it to it's own devices.

Anyway onto, arguably the worst Mega Drive game in history which, as you may had realised is based on Barney, the big purple smiling idiotic looking dinosaur. In the early 1990's "Barney and Friends" was one of children's TV's biggest...stars and in 1993 Realtime Associates along with Sega were responsible for bringing the Barney to the home console market.

The player controls Barney as he goes looking for a number of children and items associated with the children in a slightly more interactive version of the  equally appalling The Great Search for Waldo. Barney can hand on to balloons, jump and walk and yet no matter what he does, you can't help but want to punch the ugly grinning fool. What you swiftly realise though is that he walks as slowly as an old peadophile chasing down a bunch of pre-schoolers. This idea of pedophilia just gets worse when he actually finds on of the poor kids and hugs them. Not only does Barney hold them tightly but he also seems to sniff their hair and smile as he wraps his ugly, stumpy pink arms around the children.


As well as the nasty thoughts about Barney and children that would make Gary Glitter want to dress up in such a ridiculous costume you also come across 2 other very weird parts to the game. First you cannot kill Barney. If you try to step into the water or off a ledge you get Barney holding a stop sign. I thought for a second that this was subliminal messaging telling me to stop playing so then left the control and came to the other issue and the one that might make Stevie Wonder happy. If you leave the control for a minute or two Barney will walk through the entire game with out you needing to press anything. The smiling happy dope will literally complete his own game.

I really have no idea who decided that any of this was a good idea, I really need to wonder about the sanity of not only the programmers but also the poor folk that have played this, it's nothing short of a gaming nightmare that actually makes the aforementioned Waldo game look like good, challenging fun.

I was going to finish this by saying that this is the video gaming equivalent to self harm but it's not, the game completes it's self so it's more like video gaming assault. Really avoid it, avoid it like the plague, it'll last you 5 minutes of actual gaming as you swiftly breeze through it, then another 5 minutes of watching it complete it's self.

9%

Details:
Console-Sega Mega Drive
Release-1993
Developer-Realtime Associates
Genre-Self completing platform game
Players-1

Trivia:
Despite Barney being unable to go into the water on 1 level he's happy to walk underwater in another level and is unable to drown.
This game was the cause of "Retro Video Game Reviews' Hall of Shame"

The Great Waldo Search

Licensed games were all the rage in the 1990's whether it was an iconic cartoon character such as Mickey Mouse or Donald Duck, a sports star like Wayne Gretzsky or Brian Lara every other game seemed to be licensed at one point. Whilst some licensed games were amazing ("Aladdin" on the Mega Drive for example) other were simply atrocious and "The Great Waldo Search" certainly sits in the second category.

 If you are in your late teens or early 20's you will almost certainly remember the "Where's Wally?" or "Where's Waldo?" (In the US and Canada) books that most primary schools were littered with. The books were full of colour images and you have to find items in the book (most obviously the title character). They were the sort of colorful and interesting things that would keep a small child busy for a lunch time when it's raining and they were pretty cheap and good fun...sadly someone from Radiance thought it was a great idea for a game. The folks from Radiance however were wrong, very, very wrong.

When you start playing 1 of the 5 levels (which can be played in almost any order) you notice a lot of things. Firstly the graphics, they look like a 12 year old has been told to draw and scene and just stick in the Waldo/Wally character, they look garish and completely lack the charm of the books. The music is a further off putting feature and sounds incredibly naff.

The gameplay however is exactly what you would expect, you need to take a magnifying glass and click it over the items you are searching for (such as Waldo). It's simple but a bit too simple, in fact you can play through the whole game in little more than 10 minutes, which in a way is a relief as you're unlikely to want to spend much longer having your eyes abused by the graphics.

To call this a simple cash in is to state the obvious. It must be avoided like the plague, it's garish, cheap and has the life span of a may fly.

17%

Details:
Console-Sega Mega Drive, SNES and NES
Release-1992
Developer-Radiance
Genre-Puzzle
Players-1

Trivia:
The game was only released in north America (thankfully)
The game is based on the 3rd book in the series created by Martin Handford

Brian Lara Cricket '96

 When I was a little boy I was cricket obsessed, most of my family played the sport and as a result I'd been dragged into it. If you were a cricket fan during the 1990's one man stood out, that man was Brian Lara who was a living legend. It's rare to be called an icon whilst your still active in any sport but Lara was an icon, he's set numerous records and was a special cricketer. Whilst I wouldn't go as far as to say a one in a generation player (especially not what he was playing at the same time as the Little Master, Sachin Tendulkar) he was one of the greats and Codemasters knew it. If there was one thing the Mega Drive (or Gensis) did, it was make licensed sports games and Brian Lara was the name to attach to a cricket game.

The original Brian Lara cricket was released in 1995 and the following year Mega Drive fans were treated to a vastly superior update in "Brian Lara Cricket  '96". The game was simple, it was cricket what could possibly go wrong?
Well sadly an awful lot didn't quite go right. Despite a huge number of options and various matches the game sadly seemed to just lack something. In fact it seemed like much of the game was "OK" but could have been better. The music for example played only during the menu with the main game having limited sounds for the ball hitting the bat and the crowd clapping a boundary, the controls seemed to be fine until you got around to fielding which was just a total nightmare and the graphics, although decent for the era were often dull.

Despite the issues with the presentation and the somewhat difficult controls that seemed to rely on luck at times, it was oddly playable and could easily keep you busy for a few hours, especially if you were playing with a mate. It was perhaps the games multiplayer mode that did save the game from being a bit of a duck. It was whilst playing the multiplayer that you ignored the poor sounds, you gave up caring about the slightly dodgy fielding and you instead revisited the Ashes whilst sledging each other in front of the TV.
Yes it was childish but my god was it ever fun to taunt your mate who was unable to stop the series of fours that just drifted past fielders.

The single player mode of the game did have a lot of depth, ranging from Test Series, to World cups, a practice mode and even a create a team option. Whilst the game has a lot of depth the single player mode sadly fails to ignite the same levels of fun as the multiplayer mode. As a result you may find yourself unable to enjoy what is effectively an out dated product that has more than just a few flaws. Whilst it doesn't do much "wrong" as such it just doesn't really do much "right".

67%

Details:
Console-Sega Mega Drive (Europe only)
Release-1996
Developer-Codemaster
Genre- Sport (Cricket)
Players-1-4

Trivia:
A version of the game was released in Australia baring the name of "Shane Warne" the immortal Australian leg spin.
Using the create a team option you could (if you were bored) pretty much re-create any actual teams playing today.